June
2007
ready for something better
I’ve been holding on to a dream for so long now..afraid to open my eyes and allow the dream to end. Such a fool I was. The dream was nice, yes, but totally unreal..out of reach..no longer mine..not mine to begin with. When I willed myself to unclose my eyes, I had to smile. And with the slightest hint of regret I realized I should have done this before. That which is real is better, after all. I was deceived by a dream and fooled by what I thought was real, by my emotions, blind faith… I am inclined to reserve a moment or two..to weep .. indulge in self pity ..to hide from the world ..allow my pain to paralyze me until I no longer feel a thing - - but that phase is over now. Didn’t I just say that I have opened my eyes? And that I have realized….I am ready for something better - - the life that was designed for me and the love that I deserve…(may not be soon..i don’t really want it right now..whatever that is…I’m so willing to take time now..i don’t think that’s what I need right now) I can see my..sunshine after the rain (color it with rainbows pa!)..and I can hear music everywhere..I can feel it all around me.. taking me where I ought to be…carrying me away from the dream that has ended..to something much better..to something real..and this could just be my destiny.. me..my little angel..and our future..together..
Interesting to know.